I am such an idiot. If this was a physical wound, I would have bandaged it up; removed the bullet. Applied compression and cleaned it out from all the gunk.
But not with this wound. This wound has been open for years. It’s a deep one, but surely nothing takes that long to heal. But because it’s not physical I have done nothing to help the healing process. I keep going back to the source that cut me; I am not sure why I go back time and time again, although I see a knife.
My ears are eaten away by swift and sweet words of hope. A hope of new beginnings, a hope of pure love, a hope that with hard times you will not be shaken, that you will not disappear.
The crazy thing is, although YOU cut me. Your words to me seem like you have finished med-school; as though you will be the one to fix things. How can I expect that the one who cut me will be the one who aids my healing? But it’s true, we all do this; we wait for the ones that hurt us to apologize, to miraculously step up to the plate admit their mistakes and take responsibility for it.
Ridiculous, but we are all under the impression that they will leave the knife and come running with a first aid kit; as though they were possessed while hurting you.
No one wants to believe that their loved ones hurt them on purpose.
I pray yours puts down the knife and gives you a hug of apology.