Indulging

There are these annoying little habits that we have conditioned ourselves to absolutely fall for. Take this example, me and my love for McDonalds. I know that as a food type it’s not even real food- health wise, I’m sure if I cut it out:  my body will thank me for it for as long as I live; and my mind won’t scream horrible things after I eat it.

If you don’t know me- I LOVE FOOD. It’s one of the things I have conditioned my self to find…I’m not sure what I find or feel when I eat good food, but it keeps me coming back.

We all have that thing that we go to for relief.Some find it in sport, food, drugs, alcohol, sex, reading, music, Tv series, and the list goes on and on. Regardless of what your chosen item is, whether its considered good or bad by society; my point here is that you have conditioned yourself.

For me Mac was for weekends, on a friday which as a kid was the happiest day of the week! My mind associated Mac with happiness. Then it slowly crept into the days I stayed home from school, because I wanted to feel that same friday feeling since I wasn’t at school.- all this time my mind was registering that Mac= relaxation. As I grew older, and the stress of life, work, and responsibilities my mind was looking for the mechanisms that it has learnt over the years to soothe and relax its self.. to my misfortune ( well not really, due to my lifestyle) My mind went for Mac fries and a coke machine!

Becoming more aware I later realised that Mac only actually makes me feel worse…

My point is this, we are a result of our conditioning. We are a result of our daily choices. We condition ourselves, when we do something and keep on returning to it your mind takes mental cues.  It stores in your mind everything, even the tiniest of details that you may not even register in you conscious mind. It stores the people who you did it with, how it made you feel in the moment, and it burns it into your memory of good feelings.

You dive into your guilty pleasure you may say that you won’t go back to it again, no matter what happens! But your mind plays tricks on you. When you think about it again, your mind will bring up the relief, the moment you enjoyed it, your mind does not bring up the guilt, shame, or struggle that you  later dealt with, because your body is looking for an instant relief, it’s like a monkey that pops up and wont stop jumping until you satisfy your craving. In order to register the after math you need to log it in manually, only when the guilt and the frustration over rides the pleasure of relief will your mind stop bringing it up.

Your mind will keep bringing up these soothing techniques  you attempt to leave behind, because it knows no other mechanism to calm you down. It’s not true that nothing else can make you feel this way, it’s just this is what we’ve known for years now.. starting something new is out of what we know and like at the moment. If you never step out into the water you may never realise your love for the sea, and if it’s not the sea it may be the snow.

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