Collapsed in the middle of nowhere, with my start line out of sight and my destination no where in sight.
They say the decision to take the first step is the hardest, it’s an endless path of “what ifs?” Calculating what will be required to make it til the end. Always seeking out the cost of what it will take vs. the benefit that will be gained along the way.
But this all happens with your feet on the ground, even though your mind is racing in anticipation and anxiety, your feet are still on the ground. Safe. In your comfort zone.
If we’re talking about a free fall then then yes the hardest step is the first, but the anticipation and adrenaline can take over in a blink of an eye and you’ll find yourself mid air taking a plunge.
Other journeys require you to make the effort of every step. To put one foot out in front of the other.
You start off facing your challenge with adrenaline and anticipation and set off strong. But along the way, you lose the pump, the adrenaline, the motivation. Going back seems like the comforting thing to do, only to find that you can’t go back to where you were and you can know in you’re mind where you want to go, but it seems so far away that you don’t even know how you’re going to take the next step. And how many more steps will be forced and miserable like this one? Where will you find the strength to keep making these moves? When you don’t even know how far away you are from your destination, all you feel is that you’ll never get there and you will end up in a daily struggle with misery and no rest.
The gravity in the journey of a free fall carries you to the destination.
The only gravity you know is one that brings you to your knees and keeps you there.
You have to find it within yourself to put one foot in front of the other. And the thoughts come storming in: “We were fine where we were! We left what we had for this?! Let’s just go back, even if it hurts but we know how to deal with life there.”
And mid way you are stuck with a decision of whether to crawl back and stay back, because probably it will take a disaster for you to even consider moving again… Or to somehow, find some mental strength to discipline yourslef to continue putting on foot in front of the other, reminding yourself of the reason why you started this journey and breaking down the obstacles into little things rather than giving up all together.
Mustering up the strength to take the millionth step. – inspired by Soha Romeih